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I just realised that either I’m emanating an aura of general misanthropy or I’m really freaking obviously autistic

I sit alone. I eat alone. I read and listen to my music alone. At home I go immediately to my room after eating my snack and taking my meds. I stay there for upwards of 4 hours after school until dinner, at which point, I sit with my family for maybe an hour, then go back to my room. 

Most of that crap is the same for normal teenagers. But when I say I sit alone, I mean that I never sit with other people for longer than an hour. I cannot physically stand to have them near me. I don’t actually dislike them, but the closeness of them just freaks me out. Even my closest friends don’t sit next to me for longer than 90 minutes, because if they try I move away again.

Now that I’m in an entirely new set of classes with people I’ve never even seen before, I’m realising that when I arrive in class early, people always seat themselves at a distance of one chair’s gap or further from me. I don’t do anything, because I kind of like it, but it’s a little disturbing that I can be that easily sussed out after 16 years of practise.

People are hard.

Have you ever had a moment when you think that everyone knows you’re “out of the metaphorical mental health closet”? This is open to anyone except people with clinical paranoia, for obvious reasons.


Lindsay edit:

Sammy, I’ve noticed that most people won’t sit in a chair directly next to another person if there’s another available. That may just be an American thing, though.

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  1. autisticeagle posted this
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